The Curious Case of Going For Benjamin Button Alone!

Yes, sad I know but what can I do on a weekday, it is not like everyone is as free as I am.
I have wanted to watch it since it came out but never gotten the chance so as I recalled and decided to watch it today, I asked a few close friends but none seemed to be able to go or they have watched it so I picked up my beans and went for it. (Though it must be noted that this is not my first time watching a movie alone so no biggie...sobs...sobs...)

So I ended up in cinema 17 alone with popcorn on one hand and a cup of coke in the other, strolling in alone while other movie goers stared attentively.(I believe some are whispering "eh not bad looking but why come alone one?") But who cares, I came for one person, Benjamin (Yeah right! Brad bitch)


The movie as expected was a fairly good movie and it jerked a few teardrops out of me (not like the lady behind me who had her pipes turned on full blast!) but I love the story that tells you that life is a journey with two ends, and what does it matter which end does it start from because our lives would peak at the same time but when it ends, we end up in diapers anyway, as Cate Blanchett says. I felt inspired each time I watch movies like that. they teach you that love is unconditional. Love is unselfish and love can be unending... But lets not get all mushy here...


I am particularly impressed with the make-up (no wonder the Academy Award for that) where Brad looks really old and even Tilda Swinton who played Elizabeth Abbott, her make up looks pretty convincing not to mention Cate Blanchett's ultra superb make up when she was putting on her clothes when she met Brad again when she had a teenage daughter.


Favourite scene? Must be the part when Brad looked into the mirror and told Cate he wants to remember how they looked liek together... How hopelessly romantic I am right? I know...

Though it got a lil draggy in parts but when Brad turned into the dashing 40+ man, gosh, I think everyone must have gotten a hard-on seeing how delish he could still be!

He is supposed to be mine bitch!

Oh and before I forget...

... Goodnight Brad

...Goodnight People!!!

The Last Day of the Month

It's a lovely Saturday I must say as I am glad it happened the way it did. Today was initially planned with a morning visit to Pusat Penjagaan Kanak-Kanak Cacat Taman Megah with some friends then meet up this guy for coffee (apparently he finds me hot) and the final performance at Bangsar Actor's Studio. Thats it...

But what turned out to be was so much more different from what I have in mind...

So what happened was that I woke up kinda early in preparation for my visit to the Children's home but my mum and I chatted a lil more that I have turned up late to the station where I am supposed to meet my friends. I rushed and I reached a half an hour later. Since the journey to Kelana Jaya from Pasar Seni would take half an hour or so, I chatted with my friends about my performance at BSC and as I was talking on and on... An sms arrived where my friend who was supposed to come watch me perform that night got into an accident in the bathroom where he fainted and hit his head. Needless to say, he won't be coming so with the two free illusive tickets, I offered to my friends who were with me at that time. They were still unsure as they were thinking about going or not...

Leaving that for continuation later, we arrived at the home and what was set before us were children all with different sort of diseases and conditions that has garnered them the name Cacat (Handicapped) ranging from babies to adults. The home has around less than a 100 occupants and all have either cerebal palsy or down syndrome or blinded since birth and such.

A few of them actually came to my college last year and they recalled my name as well. I met a few new ones as well. One that caught my attention was a boy who was tied to a baby car seat. He could only reach out his hand and pulled me to sit with him. He couldn't communicate but all he wants is me to pat his head or place my palm on his ear. I have no idea what he wants but I would think that all he wants is just a touch from someone and that made me think. How can parents abandon their children there just like that. I am not judging and I admit that if ever I have a child like that, I am clueless if I may do the same thing but all I am saying that if I could feel for them, why can't their parents. What I keep wondering is what goes through the mind of all these children. They are clueless about the world but do they actually know what is going on outside but just that their soul could not communicate to the world at large?

So after the trip, we left for college and I have not heard from my supposed date. I suppose he lost interest in me since I sounded pushy all morning for a confirmation. Well, I couldn't be too bothered so I called up my best friend, Angel and we went out for coffee and we ended up with a good time chatting with each other. I was rather thankful that I did not meet the guy instead I got to chat (not gossip) with Angel about plans of travelling together and about musicals and stuff we love.

We left Mid Valley and my friends called me up and said that they wanted to come to watch the show after all but with two tickets, it meant that I could accomodate 2 person but they told me a6 of them would be coming. I ended up getting 1 extra ticket and the rest of them had to sit on the stairs (since that is the normal style in Actor's Studio). I was glad the girls (all 6 of them from college) came as for a few of them, this is the first time they entered a theater and they laughed their way through the comedy and enjoyed the other performances. They were glad they came too they witnessed Actor's Studio Bangsar's very last performance.

Talking about performance, we gave our very best with our last show and when we sang our last song, What I did For Love, most of us could not hold the tears in our eyes as we realised it was our last time on that very stage and that left the crowd in tears as well.

Gone... Love is never gone...

I ended my day with friends for supper and I thought to myself, so many things did not materialise but better things came a long. Is this God's way of telling me that when things didn't happen the way I planned it, is it really for the better?

PS: I also knocked into SAM, AJ and NICK... coincidence????

Oh, and some pictures I took from our performance... as well as others la!

Posing Before Show

Douglas Lim

The Three Bujang Lapoks from my choir...

Lee Swee Keong

Sutra Dancers...

Joe Hasham and Faridah Merican... the ones who started it all!

Sick Sick Sick

Well, twas the season to NOT be Merry but rather be sorry cos most of us are falling sick. With extreme heat and rain out of a sudden, most of us are left with sniffling noses and phlegmie throats... I was down with fever on my birthday and after a week, I am still recovering from that ordeal... And to top it off, my internet connections have been at it's worst and I have to quickly blog before the line dies again! (Fingers crossed)

Anyhow, as the month draws to a close, somewhere called Actor's Studio in Bangsar Shopping Centre is drawing it's curtain as well... Yes, after 8 years since they shifted from their previous premise at Dataran Merdeka, they are now closing down... for good. It is pretty sad since i first performed with the Young KL Singers there and now they are gone! But fret not as the old will go and the new, is assured to come!

A new premise is being built as we speak and the secret location will be announced soon.

As Actor's Studio closes, we the Young KL Singers are also taking the opportunity to perform for the Closing Gala where we will be singing a few song's from our previous productions like Music Brings Us Together and Kenangan Lagenda as well as our very own, Walk With Me, We are also singing from the musical, A Corus Line, What I Did For Love.

Here is to Actor's Studio, We Love You, We Miss You!

What I Did For Love - Mary J. Blige

Kiss today goodbye,
The sweetness and the sorrow.
Wish me luck, the same to you.
But I can't regret
What I did for love, what I did for love.

Look my eyes are dry.
The gift was ours to borrow.
It's as if we always knew,
And I won't forget what I did for love,
What I did for love.

Gone,
Love is never gone.
As we travel on,
Love's what we'll remember.

Kiss today goodbye,
And point me t'ward tomorrow.
We did what we had to do.
Won't forget, can't regret
What I did for
Love
What I did for
Love

What I did for...
Love
Love is never gone
As we travel one
Love's what we'll remember

Kiss today goodbye.
And point me t'ward tomorrow.(Point me t'ward tomorrow)
We did what we had to do.
Won't forget, can't regret
What I did for love.
What I did for love.

My date with my 8 Valentines...

Ahhh... Every year, Valentine's day comes very much as just another day in February, with no special plans and just one of those days where I felt that would not make a difference anyway. Hence, when Sam told me that he would love to have dinner with me and Ant, I agreed reluctantly as I cancelled my evening plans of going to church. Hence, after my afternoon at church I drove to Mid Valley since Sam told me that he was there since 1 or so...

Just Dinner right?

To my surprise, the day was relatively smooth in terms of parking as there was no delay in getting a parking lot as compared to the day before. (I had to be there for a birthday party at night at GSC Signature and my earlier half, just gossiping with Lady Gaga aka AJ and Sam.Drifting a lil, I was actually reluctant to come at first as I was not up to 3 guys having dinner during Valentines but I know I can't disappoint Sam so I appeared and we strolled around Mid Valley, me being as blur as always, followed him around as he told me Ant was with his mum in Mid Valley and needs to help her out with some shopping... Then Sam got a call...

Sam: What? They gave our table away???

No dinner???

And so I thought Tony Roma's was pissed at the fact that we are a threesome and not some couple who would splurge a lot that night. So I thought to myself, "Great... now what?" We ended up at Chilis and what was set before me was such a shocker... A long line of people trying to get in and I was asked to stand in line while Sam went to find Ant... A couple of minutes later, Sam told me to go in and there they were, AJ, Froggie and Dan in their stripped shirts... Then it dawned upon me, this was a surprise birthday party. I thought, "Damn... was it my previous post who sparked this like for real?" (Though Sam has expressed that he was gonna do a get together cum birthday party on the 21st)

I was speechless... I was glad that later Bong and Joshie came as well... And before long, Ant joined us... All night long, we chatted and laughed so much. It was like we have known each other for ages though Froggie was a lil under the weather and didn't contribute much but his mere presence there was enough to reaffirm me how sweet of him to leap all the way to KL from Seremban.
Froggie and Lady Gaga

A few Chilis staff later came with my Brownies topped with Ice cream and candles while the surprise came later as Bong and Joshie spoiled me to a Suchan's Tiramisu cake, my fave...

Yummy!!!

Before long, it was the presents that I was anticipating all night... Dan bought me a lovely Jackson 5 CD that has the song I audition ed for Malaysian Idol with while Ant got me pendant with an Irish symbol in overcoming obstacles... lastly, Sam and the rest bought me a lovely CD, hidden in a book called "Beyond The Age of Innocence" and beneath the CD, were 4 brand new Durex condoms... I was told to be "safe"!

As we later adjourned to Nirvana for a chat, I had not had such lovely company for such a long time. Keen Yee later joined us and I was just pleased to share company with all these lovely guys... and what better was to spend time with them than on Valentine's day...

Love you guys!

To Make You Feel My Love

I was just listening to a song I had in my Itunes playlist... and there was this song that got me into my romantic mood again... A Billy Joel song and now sung by Grammy Best New Artist, Adele. I printed the chords and started to play it on my piano. I sang it and it dawned upon me how lovely this song was talking about the simple things done just that someone could feel my love. I wonder what people will do so that someone else felt their love...more importantly, who will do that, for me?

When the rain
Is blowing in your face
And the whole world
Is on your case
I could offer you
A warm embrace
To make you feel my love

When the evening shadows
And the stars appear
And there is no one there
To dry your tears
I could hold you
For a million years
To make you feel my love

I know you
Haven't made
Your mind up yet
But I would never
Do you wrong
I've known it
From the moment
That we met
No doubt in my mind
Where you belong

I'd go hungry
I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling
Down the avenue
No, there's nothing
That I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love

The storms are raging
On the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
Though winds of change
Are throwing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing
Like me yet

I could make you happy
Make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends
Of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love

Hans Christian Anderson

When I was a child, I was drowned with storybooks galore... I have the a whole collection in which is now collecting dust in a shelf hidden in my storeroom. With my very bad habit (but I think its a good one) of having books to "accompany" my toilet time, I decided to bring one of those unfinished collections in for a flip. Out of the lot, I pick out Hans Christian Andersons collection of stories which included The Little Mermaid, Thumbelina, The Lil TinSoldier and a whole lot more...

As I read through those wonderful stories, I realised they still hold some truth in the lessons that we are still learning today. Take for example, The story of the Emporer's New Clothes. The naked truth is that we believe in what others think and no matter how foolish it was, we are blinded by the fact that we believe in even a myth than trusting our own instincts. Sad but true. We listen to what seemed to be the "acceptable view" and never even question it, worried about being the "odd one out". In this case, a child asked the most simplistic question and shamed the king and his men!

How about the story of the Fir Tree where he longed to be what he heard from the sparrow and worst, he wished that he was chopped down just so that he could "experience" what other "fir trees" have. At the end of the day it was nothing to shout about rather, it hurt him so much more... We longed to be all but ourselves and we are never grateful for who we are until we experience it but too late, we've crossed the line!

Oh and my personal favourite during puberty was "The Ugly Duckling"... I wonder if I have ever turned into swan (I hope, cross me fingers)but we all judge one another by the way someone looks don't we? We talk about their apperance not knowing whats within and they turn out to be the great and amazing people...

We have heard these stories a million times and they possess beautiful messages yet, today, these are the very lessons we fail to learn! Is it just us or is it our human nature, that we never are able to learn from our mistakes? Or is our dear author so divine that he could forsee that in us? The best part, such stories speak to me so much as a gay guy and to my suprise to find Hans Anderson a Bi!

Birthday!

Well, today happens to be my birthday... Well, only according to the Chinese calender anyway. I am born on the ninth day of chinese new year back in the days but my actual birthday is not until two weeks time. What happened was, I was wondering how should I celebrate my birthday this year. Should I go out with friends and have a good time? Or should I spend it alone?

Looking back on my previous years... I have had a birthday party when I turned 21 with just family and friends having some of the best beef in shabu-shabu style! Nothing special happened though... some didn't even turn up with presents... They all think its a party only! When I turned 20 I booked a room at Redbox and paid for my friends. Guess what, I forgot to buy my own cake... and I thought they would bring one for me... How silly... The thing is, I have attended many surprise birthday parties and well, surprisingly, no one wants to plan one for me... Does this prove I do not have enough friends or rather, ones who are close enough who wants to make the only day I have the right to be happy, be happy?

Ahh... but such were the thoughts of a young teenager... now, I have outgrown it (I am old di la!!!) and I no longer long for such surprise birthday parties and stuff. Its fun I know, but the time has come that my birthday should reflect something else than just birthday cakes, presents and such...

But this remains, what should I do for my birthday?